What is this? Guilt-free mom time? How is the mom time possible, let alone having it without guilt? You know how it is, as homeschoolers there is this perception that we're somehow super-human, equipped with un-ending reservoirs of patience; and if we aren't, we should be.
Hah!
I know better... now. There was a time when I did have that perception, I was terrified of homeschooling because I knew that I did not have a never-ending supply of patience. I knew I'd blow my stack and somehow scar the kids for life. I knew I simply needed my "me time" and that there would be none if we homeschooled the twins.
I know now how wrong I was about nearly every perception I had about homeschooling, about not having a chance for time to myself, not having "me time." I think that's what scared me the most: The inability to get away for a little while to recharge without guilt. I adore my family, but even a homeschool mom needs a break - I am human, even though I joke about being Wonder Woman. Can't be Wonder Woman without an invisible jet.
Here are three ways to get guilt-free mom time:
- Get up a bit early.
I've never been much for mornings, but honestly, sometimes it's the only way I can find time to myself. I love the quiet of the early morning outside, toes in the grass, birds singing, woodpeckers pecking... Currently our resident flock of green parrots is making a lot of noise, but they're really funny to watch. It's really peaceful to spend time outside without the boys running around me like maniacs. - Sign up for a class.
Really. I recently started taking a belly dance class. Years ago, I danced and loved it - I had no idea how much I missed it until I started this class. There's a room full of women, so I'm not surrounded by testosterone for one hour every week. Truly a thing of beauty.You don't have to take a dance class, but maybe a pottery class or something of the sort. The bottom line is find something that's only for you, and enjoy the heck out of it. - Run away for a little while.
When your day has been absolutely insane, filled with tears, unfinished work, fights and frustration, go somewhere when your spouse gets home. You can go to the local coffee shop and sit with a mug of chai tea, read a book and be around adults for a while. It's a nice change.
Guilt shouldn't even be part of this equation, but we somehow feel less than great when we have a need. These ideas aren't rocket-science or life-changing, but taking time to yourself is a necessary part of taking care of yourself. After all, we cannot truly take care of others if our own needs are not met. I understand having guilt in even asking for mom-time (or dad-time), but I know that I'm a better mom, wife, and overall person when I take the time for myself. I'm sure I'm not alone.
What do you do to take care of yourself?
Everyone has a different idea for what they need. The basic fact that we're all wired just a little differently shouldn't be news to homeschoolers - isn't that part of why we homeschool?
Some of these ideas may be difficult for single parents - and I confess to not having recent experience in that area! If you are single, I would love for you to share your ideas on getting time to yourself.
Share some ideas in the comments!
Love this! Mom time is so important for recharging and renewing ourselves. I do #1 and #3 often. I need to work on getting into a class though. Thanks so much for sharing.
Glad you like it! I had forgotten how much fun a class was- so happy I did it.
My favorite way to re-charge is to have my husband take the kids for the day, and I can spend time at home, totally quiet where I can actually rest, think, pray, or get things done.
I love to do that! I just wind up feeling rather out of sorts because the house is SO quiet. LOL That said, uninterrupted hours of playing my viola is a beautiful thing – and my quartet co-members like it. 😉
I don’t drive so it’s difficult for me to get away. I run a small in-home daycare (currently 2 toddlers – my 3rd one recently moved), homeschool my 11-year-old, and, on top of the daily chores/cooking around the house, I help my husband with his public school work (making posters, grading papers, etc.). I even do a bit of freelance typing here and there and work my church’s preschool every Wednesday night. My best friend actually got on to me a couple of days ago for not writing. She’s the only one who harasses me about it. I do love her for that, though. We’ve known each other for 27 years so she’s always known it’s my passion. One day it’ll happen. My writing is my escape.
That is difficult! I wonder if you could carpool with someone to a class you both would like… IDK. But you sound just as busy as I am!!
I do love my writing… working on a couple more books as we speak.
Great tips. I got in the habit of getting up before everyone else – especially my kids when they were small and now that they’re adults and out of the house, I still do! I like that uninterrupted (hubby gets up early so I have to be earlier than he is!) quiet time first thing in the morning to set my day on the right course.
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